Lola and Oatmeal return to Paleo eating.

Well, it’s been a long time coming, but we decided to jump back on the bandwagon. 

Meaning… Lola decided to jump onto the bandwagon again.  Oatmeal never actually fell off.

“Fell off” is actually putting it lightly.  Lola didn’t just fall off… she was yanked/jerked/pummeled/ripped off of the Paleo truck during her first trimester.  It wasn’t fun, it wasn’t pretty, and it involved a lot of vomiting, dry heaving, and tears.  Pregnancy nausea is no joke, people.  I’m not saying paleo is impossible during pregnancy, but it sure was a lot harder for Lola.  One day I’ll write a post on how I will go about my next pregnancy.

So, if it’s so hard to eat Paleo while pregnant, WHY BOTHER?  Well, for the following reasons…

  • My willpower has decreased since getting pregnant, but I still have to admit that I feel yucky when I’m eating a lot of processed food.  Over the past 6 months I’ve slowly added lots of dairy, chips, french fries, and sugar back into my diet, but the amounts of these things dramatically increased at Christmas.  For obvious reasons, of course.  Who has willpower at Christmas?  Not me!  I’ve been a lot more likely to cheat and eat bread/gluten.  Pregnancy was always the excuse.  No one (except Oatmeal) will argue with a pregnant Lola who wants a block of cheese or a bowl of ice cream.  But, since eating all the processed junk again, I’ve had skin problems, chronic headaches, bladder infections, and mood swings (now the mood issues really just may be the pregnancy… that much I admit!).
  • Poppyseed is just not getting any benefit from the ice cream, egg nog, tortilla chips, and cheddar cheese.  (Nor the two pizzas I’ve consumed entirely on my own…. or the 6 glazed donuts that I may or may not have eaten in a crazed fury outside of the Shipley’s on the way to work.)  End of story.  I know a lot of women eat stuff like that when they are pregnant and things turn out just fine.  I truly do.  But, I also don’t think many people would disagree that, if possible, a diet full of truly natural food has got to at least have SOME advantages vs a diet full of processed food.  (Although I gotta be honest… I don’t really feel that bad about the eggnog or 2 pizzas.  A girl’s gotta enjoy SOME guilty pleasures…. right?!)
  • Pregnancy weight gain.  I don’t really care if I gain 20lbs or 50lbs with this pregnancy.  I really could care less.  If I feel good, and this kid pops out relatively close to the due date and is healthy and happy, I have total faith that I’ll bounce back to my old self.  I can handle a few stretch marks or other such “marks of motherhood.”  But, if I eat a bunch of junk and THEN see those lingering effects, I’ll wish I’d been more careful.

So… the time has come for a comeback.  And here is what we are doing, beginning today.  And, day 1 has gone well!

Rather than make up our own rules, I ripped them off from a website that I really like, but I copied and pasted off that website to save you the extra click.  So, here are our new household rules, followed by Lola’s adjustments below.

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The Whole30 Rules….. follow these rules for 30 days.

Eat real food – meat, seafood, eggs, tons of vegetables, some fruit, and plenty of good fats from fruits, oils, nuts and seeds. Eat foods with very few ingredients, all pronounceable ingredients, or better yet, no ingredients listed at all because they’re totally natural and unprocessed. Don’t worry… these guidelines are outlined in extensive detail in our Shopping Guide.

More importantly, here’s what NOT to eat during the duration of your Whole30 program. Omitting all of these foods and beverages will help you regain your healthy metabolism, reduce systemic inflammation, and help you discover how these foods are truly impacting your health, fitness and quality of life.

  • Do not consume added sugar of any kind, real or artificial. No maple syrup, honey, agave nectar, Splenda, Equal, Nutrasweet, xylitol, stevia, etc. Read your labels, because companies sneak sugar into products in ways you might not recognize.
  • Do not consume alcohol, in any form, not even for cooking. (And it should go without saying, but no tobacco products of any sort, either.)
  • Do not eat grains. This includes (but is not limited to) wheat, rye, barley, oats, corn, rice, millet, bulgur, sorghum, amaranth, buckwheat, sprouted grains and all of those gluten-free pseudo-grains like quinoa. Yes, we said corn… for the purposes of this program, corn is a grain! This also includes all the ways we add wheat, corn and rice into our foods in the form of bran, germ, starch and so on. Again, read your labels.
  • Do not eat legumes. This includes beans of all kinds (black, red, pinto, navy, white, kidney, lima, fava, etc.), peas, chickpeas, lentils, and peanuts. No peanut butter, either. This also includes all forms of soy – soy sauce, miso, tofu, tempeh, edamame, and all the ways we sneak soy into foods (like lecithin).
  • Do not eat dairy. This includes cow, goat or sheep’s milk products such as cream, cheese (hard or soft), kefir, yogurt (even Greek), and sour cream…  with the exception of clarified butter or ghee. (See below for details.)
  • Do not eat white potatoes. This is somewhat arbitrary, but if we are trying to change your habits and improve the hormonal impact of your food choices, it’s best to leave white, red, purple, Yukon gold and fingerling potatoes off your plate. (Refer to your Success Guide FAQ for details).

In addition, no Paleo-ifying dessert or junk food choices!  We call this “Sex With Your Pants On” (SWYPO), and it will ruin your Whole30 faster than you can say, “Paleo pizza.”  Do not try to shove your old, unhealthy diet into a shiny new Whole30 mold. This means no “Paleo-fying” desserts or junk food – no Paleo pancakes, pizza, brownies or ice cream. Trying to replicate junk food with “technically approved” ingredients misses the point of the Whole30 entirely.

One last and final rule. You are not allowed to step on the scale or take any body measurements for the duration of the program. This is about so much more than just weight loss, and to focus on your body composition means you’ll miss out on the most dramatic and lifelong benefits this plan has to offer. So, no weighing yourself, analyzing body fat or taking comparative measurements during your Whole30. (We do encourage you to weigh yourself before and after, however, so you can see one of the more tangible results of your efforts when your program is over.)

The Fine Print

A few concessions, based on our experience, and those of our clients. These foods are exceptions to the rule, and are allowed during your Whole30. Including these foods as part of your varied healthy eating plan should not negatively impact the results of your Whole30 program.

  • Clarified Butter or Ghee. Clarified butter or ghee is the only source of dairy allowed during your Whole30. Plain old butter is NOT allowed, as the milk proteins found in non-clarified butter could impact the results of your program. Refer to our Butter Manifesto for more details on the milk proteins found in butter, purchasing high quality butter, and how to clarify it yourself.
  • Fruit juice as a sweetener. Some products will use orange or apple juice as a sweetener. We have to draw the line somewhere, so we’re okay with a small amount of fruit juice as an added ingredient during your Whole30… but this doesn’t mean a cup of fruit juice is a healthy choice! Refer to your Shopping Guide for clarification.
  • Certain legumes. We’re fine with green beans, sugar snap peas and snow peas. While they’re technically a legume, these are far more “pod” than “bean”, and green plant matter is generally good for you. (Refer to your Success Guide FAQ for details.)
  • Vinegar. Most forms of vinegar, including white, balsamic, apple cider, red wine, and rice, are allowed during your Whole30 program. The only exceptions are vinegars with added sugar, or malt vinegar, which generally contains gluten.
  • Processed foods. Minimally processed foods like canned coconut milk, applesauce, tomato sauce, chicken broth or canned olives are all acceptable on the Whole30 – but avoid anything with carageenan, MSG or sulfites. We’ve singled these three additives/preservatives out because they all have potentially nasty side effects – and you can easily find processed foods without them.

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Okay, so here are my adjustments….

  • I’m not doing the whole “zero dairy” thing.  Again, you only live once, and I’m growing a baby for goodness sake.  If I want some heavy cream in my decaf coffee, I’m going to have some cream in my coffee.  I’m also not giving up my Greek yogurt… I only have it a few mornings a month and it makes me happy and feel good.  Sue me.  Now, I will be cooperative and toss cheese out the window.  That much I’ll do.
  • Butter.  I’m probably still going to scramble my eggs with butter, and I honestly don’t think it’s that big of a deal.  This challenge wants me to use clarified butter or ghee, which I would happily use if it were to magically appear in my fridge. HEB does not sell it, I can’t find it in any store in my work territory, and I’m just not driving the 50 miles to Whole Foods just for that one thing.  So, if anyone happens to be driving from Whole Foods to Cat Spring anytime soon, please feel free to drop off some ghee.  Til then… I’m really not worried about it.  
  • Chocolate covered almonds.  I’m not giving them up.  Ever.  No woman (pregnant or not) should ever have to give up chocolate.  Ever.

So…. wish me luck.  I only have 14 weeks (approximately) to myself to actually put this much effort into my own health.  I know that once Poppyseed arrives, I’ll automatically take a back seat.  So… here’s to my last 14 weeks of putting myself first!

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